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Why are women drawn to Fifty Shades of Grey? I’ve heard it called “mommy porn,” and I agree, it is. But what is attracting us to it? Women long for romance. God made us to be romanced, to be beautiful, to be wanted. But, we are broken, wounded, hurting. Somehow, maybe it makes sense in our brokenness that the romance, sex and femaleness in Fifty Shades of Grey are all we are really worth.

Because I’ve been reading Captivating, by John & Stasi Eldredge (a MUST read!), I’ve been considering these same issues in my own life. And, after watching the trailer for Fifty Shades of Grey, my heart sank, and I started asking myself, “Why? Why do we fall for this?” Is it because we don’t really believe the truth and our hearts are drawn to romance, no matter what it looks like? Here, my dear, beautiful sisters are Fifty Shades of Truth:

You are beautiful.

You are captivating.

You are a stunning God creation.

You are purely alluring, not perversely seductive.

Your body, soul and emotions are to be cherished.

You are wanted.

You are seen.

You are loved.

You are broken, yes, but you are mending.

You are worth it.

You are worth fighting for.

You are worth searching for.

You are worth loving.

Your heart is worth knowing.

You are worth protecting.

You are worthy of rescuing.

You are worth caring about.

You are worthy of noticing.

You are worthy of romance.

Your heart matters.

You are chosen.

You are lovely.

Your beauty is an expression of hope, not of fear or domination.

Your beauty will not diminish with time but will grow ever more appealing as you trust your heart to God.

You can find refuge and protection in love.

In the midst the wilderness, God says, “I remember the devotion of your youth, your love as a bride, how you followed me in the wilderness…” (1)

God promises, “Therefore, behold, I will allure her, and bring her into the wilderness, and speak tenderly to her.” (2)

God says, “I have loved you with an everlasting love.” (3)

A real man waits to truly romance a woman until after he has signed the contract of marriage.

A real man will not use sex for his selfish desires.

A real man will not desert you in your times of hard.

A real man protects women.

A real man makes sure you are safe.

A real man will not replace love with sex.

A real man will see “his lady” as his helpmate, in the same way we see God when we are in big trouble.

A real man will offer you his strength, not the strength of dominance and fear but of protection and refuge from life’s storms.

A real man will respect you, body, soul and spirit.

Your beauty reflects God Himself.

You are made in the image of God in order to draw others to God’s beauty.

Your beauty entices others to embrace life, not death.

Your beauty will convince others of God’s healing grace.

You are gifted.

You are needed.

You have something to offer.

You are redeemed.

You are forgiven.

You are cherished.

You can make the world a more beautiful place.

You are irreplaceable.

You are beautiful.

“You are made for romance, and the only one who can offer it to you consistently and deeply is Jesus.” (4) When was the last time you paid attention to God romancing your heart? Was it this morning’s sunrise? Was it in the beautiful smile of your child? Was it a love note you discovered in the pages of His Word? If you don’t know, ask Him. Ask Him to romance your heart. Do not give way to the lies because they somehow seem true of your broken self. Don’t hear the counterfeit as the truth. Listen to the Lover of your Soul, dear one.

 

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1. Jeremiah 2:2
2. Hosea 2:14
3. Jeremiah 31:3
4. John & Stasi Eldredge, Captivating (Nashville, TN: Thomas Nelson, 2005),125.

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