Yesterday, I had a personal victory! This weekend was probably one of the busiest weekends our family has ever had in regard to hosting. We had 3 groups of different people in our home in less than 24 hours.
If you know me like my family does, you might be able to guess my victory in the midst of all the chaos. Here it is: While we were getting ready, I did not yell, get frustrated or exhibit anger (all things that I do when I’m under stress). The bigger the event, the more stress I bring into our home. I get so focused on getting ready that I forget to act kindly to those I love. Ironically, I want things to go well and for our guests to have a good time. And things at the gatherings do go well, but not necessarily for my family who works with me beforehand.
God is teaching me that it is really important to do all the good things, but with a right, godly attitude. Though it is important to do good deeds, if doing those good deeds causes me to be unkind or unloving or is an offense to my fellow man, I might as well not do the good thing at all.
This morning, I was studying to prepare my heart for the Passover/Resurrection season coming up. What I read made me feel so very glad I did well yesterday, but also sobered me because of my behavior in the past. First, the author said, “We take great care, when fulfilling (good deeds), to ensure that every detail of the associated (way to do it) is fulfilled without error.”(1) I can relate to that. I want to do things well. I want to take great care that what I do for the Lord is my best.
Then he went on to say that the anxiety we feel over our desire to do something without error may cause us to become angry, lose our composure and offend those working with us.(2) Ouch. Yep, I can also relate to that.
The example he used was the tradition some have of making their own matzah just hours before the Passover Seder begins. I personally have never even tried to make matzah. Possibly for a couple of reasons. 1) It is really easy to just go buy some. 2) Though the ingredients of matzah and bread are basically the same, matzah must be unleavened. The difference is in the scrupulous preparation and baking.(3)
Though making matzah might be really fun and probably meaningful, I’d have to be sure that my composure could remain in tact before I ever attempted it. Why? Because, “baking matzah with anger is as serious an offense as baking matzah with (leaven).”(4) In other words, doing a good deed /commandment (especially in the name of the Lord) with anger (or some other carnal attitude) is as serious an offense as breaking one of God’s commandments.
Jesus said the greatest command is to love the Lord with all your heart and to love your neighbor as yourself. It doesn’t mean we shouldn’t do all the other good deeds of Scripture, but it does mean that it is imperative to do those good deeds with the attitude of love for God and for man.
Without love, I truly am an annoying clanging cymbal, which can make other people feel irritated and possibly even angry. What good does it do to perform a good deed if I hurt someone in the process? “Love is more important than all the effort (one) expends in fulfilling the (good deeds of the Scriptures).”(5)
During this season of Passover, we are supposed to be looking for the leaven in our hearts. What is the little bit of leaven (sin) that works through the whole batch for you? I’m so very glad that at the beginning of this season God is already revealing to me the small grains that leaven my life with sin.
My first lesson: if I can’t be loving while I’m doing all my good stuff, it is probably better for me not to do the good stuff at all….at least until I get my heart in the right place.
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1. Eliyahu Kitov, The Book of Our Heritage (Jerusalem, Israel: Feldheim Publishers, 1997), 560.
2. Ibid.
3. To make something unleavened, you have to be really careful to cook the mixture of flour and water before it has time to ferment/leaven. Matzah has to be baked within 18 minutes.
4. Eliyahu Kitov, The Book of Our Heritage (Jerusalem, Israel: Feldheim Publishers, 1997), 560.
5. Ibid, 562.
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photo(s) courtesy of FluidChurch.net (http://www.fluidchurch.net)
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